North by Northwest- Oh Canada

* Disclaimer- Chris and I traveled to the Pacific Northwest and a cruise to Alaska in June 2016 as a 10 year anniversary trip. This will be a multiple entry blog that will highlight our activities, our reflections and of course pictures of these gorgeous locations! I have highlighted the tips and tricks of each post in red. I hope this helps in planning trips to Vancouver, Seattle or Alaska! Thanks again for following along! 

Day 2- June 17, 2016
Vancouver, B.C.

We love Vancouver! 

The sun came through the window around 5AM and it was bright! Despite our lack of sleep we were wide awake so we went for a morning jog... in another country! It was a brisk 48* jog up and down the hills around the hotel. It was AWESOME to be able to jog in another country and I was able to cross off yet another thing on my bucket list! This trip was already turning out to be AMAZING!

1.5 miles in CANADA! Heck yeah! 

We left the hotel just after 7 and faced the Friday rush-hour traffic to get to downtown Vancouver. The hotel did not offer a free breakfast so we were already hungry but fortunately as soon as we got parked we saw a food truck and got some very tasty poached egg sandwiches.

A view of Hastings St. in the morning... it was even more apparent how sad these people have it! 

I think you haven't seen a city until you've eaten from a food truck! 

We then went to Canada Place on the Vancouver Harbor to walk around and decided to rent a few electrical bikes to tour the city. We traveled all around the harbor and into Stanley Park. Stanley Park was absolutely beautiful and really green! Plus it is a FREE attraction and well worth at least a walk-thru while in Vancouver! We saw several totem poles and even a light house. We only had an hour on these bikes as we had purchased a tour of the Vancouver Harbor for 11AM. As the time lapsed we had to hurry to get back to turn in the bikes and we were lost. Somehow we ended up on Lions Gate Bridge and rode our bikes as fast as we could down the "somewhat" protected bike lanes of the busy streets of Vancouver! It was so exhilarating and just incredible! We ended up turning in the bikes 1 minute late but we were still able to get to the Harbor Tour with time to spare! Renting bikes in Vancouver is the way to go if you are wanting to see the entire city as it is really spread out! Bikes averaged about $6-10 per hour compared to the $50-60 official tours. 

We've got our bikes and we are ready to go explore! 

We found a Totem Pole sanctuary during our exploring! 

The Harbor Tour was incredible and very fascinating as we learned all kinds of information and history about this gorgeous city! We even saw a few harbor seals and even a bald eagle. This would be the first of MANY bald eagles seen on this overall trip to the Pacific Northwest and Alaska. This tour cost $33 per person and lasted over 90 minutes. I think it was worth the money paid and an over very good tour of this city; however, the narration was hard to hear (especially since the group of Asians were talking non-stop right beside us) but Chris and I both enjoyed it very much! 

We are ready for the Harbor Cruise! 

Oh Canada! 

Vancouver had a HUGE harbor and lots of SeaPlanes!
It was fascinating to see them land and take-off! 

A view of downtown Vancouver from the Harbor Tour.
Royal Caribbean's Radiance of the Seas was in port for embarkation to Alaska!

The Sisters mountain in North Vancouver! 

This was "North Vancouver" a town that created their own housing district and downtown to compete with the REAL Vancouver! We later learned that Vancouver is so foreign now that the cost of living has skyrocketed to over $5,000 a month for a small apartment downtown. This North Vancouver was tired of that so they built their own city! 

The Canadian JELLO factory! Remind me to never eat Jello again! 

Bald Eagle #1!

On the Harbor Tour coming back to the pier! 

My traditional life preserver picture! 

After the Harbor Tour we were getting hungry so we walked over 10 city blocks back to Canada Place to see what restaurants were there but most of them were crammed with office people eating during the lunch rush. I had read about Meat & Bread in downtown so we headed that way. This turned out to be a FANTASTIC find. It was a simple menu of just 5 options and all fully loaded with delicious meat options! It was less than $20 for both of us which included 2 sandwiches, soup and even a salad. If you are ever in the Vancouver area you really need to eat here! It was delicious! 

You've gotta try this!

The menu at Meat & Bread! So simple and yet so amazing! 

By this time we were feeling the lack of sleep for 2 nights in a row so we were needing some coffee. I expected to see Starbucks but instead we found JJ Bean which turned out to be the best coffee either of us have had. We then went to walk around Canada Place. We walked the Canadian Trail and learned about the history of the beautiful country and we even played some Canadian trivia. I have been to Toronto and Montreal and now Vancouver and I have thoroughly enjoyed all of these unique cities. We decided to try out FlyOver Canada as Chris's uncle recommend it. It was a 3/4D simulated ride that took you all over the country of Canada and at less than $17 per person it was a great attraction. The ride lasted approximately 15 minutes and we really enjoyed it. In fact we think it was the surprise of the Vancouver portion of our trip. I would highly recommend it! 

Canada Place was really neat and FREE! Be sure to check it out when in Vancouver! 

It was mid afternoon and we were going to head back to the good ol' "US of A" soon so we made our way to Gastown to buy some souvenirs before we headed back.

The famous Gastown Clock in Gastown near downtown Vancouver B.C..

We saw this type of thing all over Vancouver. Even in the "nicer" Gastwon touristy area! 

We had to go back through Surrey as we left our bags at the front desk. After seeing the craziness of Hastings St. in Vancouver we thought leaving all of our belongs in a car in downtown was not smart. This added a little time to our trip but we were still able to make it back to Seattle around 7pm.

I'm proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free! 

We got checked into our room at Embassy Suites in Lynnwood, WA. This was a standard Embassy Suites room that was very large and sufficient for the 2 of us. And it was 50% of what the downtown hotels were costing and in a very nice suburb of Seattle. The daily commute was about 15-25 minutes and just gorgeous when "the mountain was out". If you are willing to commute each day I would recommend staying in Lynnwood and especially the Embassy Suites. 

Our 1 room King suite at Embassy Suites... Sorry I forgot to take pictures until the end! 

After we got settled in we then went out to dinner at the famous Old Spaghetti Warehouse. It was just like I remembered it with the train in the middle of restaurant and everything. The food was just average but we were so tired we didn't care.

2 days down and we are already exhausted! 

We ventured into Walmart to get a few things we had forgot and then back to our hotel. As we were pulling back into what we thought was the hotel driveway a homeless person with a "HELP ME" sign started yelling at us "Whoa Whoa bro you can't do this". After just getting back from Hasting St. in Vancouver we thought "Wow these homeless people are aggressive. Geez". Well it turns out that Chris was turning into one-way traffic on an interstate exit. He had to put it into reverse and get back on the main road to go 100 yards to our actual hotel driveway. We laughed about this for hours and days and days! We were cruising the glacier in Alaska and still cracking up about it! 

We made it to our room and almost immediately crashed as we were SO tired from 2 very long and exhausting days! The best of our land vacation in the Pacific Northwest was yet to come so we needed a good night's sleep. Despite the beautiful weather of 55* outside, the AC was not working our room so it got very hot really fast and unfortunately it never improved during our stay at Embassy Suites. I was now regretting not bring the camping fan I use on most of my cruises... Dang you airline baggage fees!  

These 2 days in Vancouver were awesome and we loved EVERY minute of it! We were surprised by how much we enjoyed this city and are already "planning" another trip back! Day 3 would start our adventures in Seattle! Be sure to check back for tips and tricks for Seattle and the Pacific Northwest! Thanks for following along! 

God is Good... All the time! 

Missed a day?

Day 1/ Vancouver- No Rest for the Weary

North by Northwest- No Rest for the Weary

* Disclaimer- Chris and I traveled to the Pacific Northwest and a cruise to Alaska in June 2016 as a 10 year anniversary trip. This will be a multiple entry blog that will highlight our activities, our reflections and of course pictures of these gorgeous locations! I have highlighted the tips and tricks of each post in red. I hope this helps in planning trips to Vancouver, Seattle or Alaska! Thanks again for following along! 

Day 1- June 16, 2016
Arrival and Vancouver, B.C. Canada 

RING RING RING... Our alarms were blasting loud and clear at 3:30AM. All of our bags were packed and we were ready to get our the door to get to the airport for our 7AM flight. We had not flown in over 7 years so we did not know what to expect. We were parked before 5AM and headed to get checked in and go through what we expected to be a long security line. We flew Southwest and they had great self-service kiosks that allowed us to check in and turn in our bags without a line. Then the security line was so short we were in and out within minutes. Around 5:30AM we were all the way through the security lines and at our gate. We had so much time we decided to eat breakfast at Pappacitos. We did not want to drink caffeine so we could try to sleep on the plane but unfortunately that did not happen.

Leaving on a jet plane! 

We were flying on a 737 that holds 180 passengers but we were lucky enough to have only 143 passengers on board. In fact, both Chris and I had a "B" boarding group and were able to get 2 seats together on the very first row! Talk about excess leg room... It was AWESOME. We touched down at 9:54AM (Pacific time) and were headed to the baggage claim area. I was so nervous that some of our luggage would be lost but we spotted all 3 of my tacky giraffe print luggage and both of Chris's standard blue so we were good to go.

I love living in Houston. 

How often do you get this much leg room on a plane. 

Mt. Rainer from the air! 

Our first view of Seattle from the plane. 

We stepped out of the airport and thought "Is this really summer?" 

We rode the shuttle to the Rental Car location off the airport site and got our Nissan Juke for our 5 day adventure in Seattle and Vancouver. Once we got that squared away we were on our way. We stopped in Lynnwood, a small suburb just north of Seattle, to eat lunch. We wanted something fast and easy so naturally we stopped at KFC... Wait, what? Yes out of all of the local great food we ate our 1st northwest meal at KFC... What can I say, my man wanted fried chicken!

Our Nissan Juke... It was great for Chris's tall body but not good for hauling a LOT of luggage. 

My 1st look at why I came to Seattle! 

We stopped in Bellingham just south of the US/Canada border to have our 1st Starbucks of the trip and switch drivers so I would be driving across the border. We waited about 20 minutes in line before reaching the customs agent who asked all kinds of questions as to why we were traveling to Canada and what we would be doing with the car while on our cruise. It was a typical border crossing. Chris was so excited as this was his first trip to Canada.

When in Rome... These were everywhere! 

We made it to our hotel in Surrey, B.C., a suburb about 25 miles southeast of Vancouver, just before the check-in time and our room was not ready so we utilized the free WiFi to get directions and maps of where we would be going to not have to pay the international fees. Once our room was ready we unloaded the VERY FULL Nissan Juke (not a great car for traveling, even with only 2 people) and then started to head into Vancouver to co to Capilano Suspension Bridge. 

The Capilano Suspension Bridge and park were AMAZING! One of the most fascinating and interesting tourist activities I have done in a long time. We learned all about the types of trees in the Pacific Northwest and were able to walk high in the trees on a special suspension bridge and even a boardwalk! I would highly recommend this tourist attraction to anyone visiting Vancouver. It was about $32 per person and well worth it. It had all kinds of activities and things to see as well as several stores and eateries including a coffee shop. They even featured live music and naturalist talks and hosts. It was fantastic and I know my kids would have loved it too.

We're here! 

There was a Totem Pole area at the entrance to the park and it was fascinating! 

The Suspension Bridge was crazy busy which made the experience even more exciting! 

This was the bridge from the top of the treetop boardwalk. 

Attention EXTREME Nature Ahead! Chris was LOVING this! 

This was on the Cliff Walk portion of the park that featured a bridge over a cliff! It was very exhilarating! 

Me- "Look honey a bear! Take a picture of me as this may be the only one we see this trip"

Little did I know I would be seeing a REAL black bear in less than an hour! 

We left Capilano and went to Goose Mountain just outside of town as recommend from a local. It is free and gorgeous so be sure to check it out when in Vancouver! We were able to go to a lookout and see the ENTIRE city. It was beautiful and so peaceful. We continued up the mountain to another lookout and watched as the sun was about to set (at 9:30PM mind you). On our way back down the mountain the car in front of us stopped and then pointed out to the area beside the road and there was a small black bear. It was incredible. I have never seen a bear in the wild and to spot one on the first night was even more special to me. My trip was already made and it was just night #1.

One of my favorite pictures from the entire trip!
We LOVED Vancouver! 

Canada Place from atop Goose Mountain. 

A look at downtown Vancouver from the lookout. 

Downtown Vancouver was absolutely gorgeous! Very metropolitan and cosmopolitan. We enjoyed it so much and when we do return for another Alaskan cruise we will be sure to sail from Vancouver! It was just breathtaking! 

These are the mountains of Washington as seen from the top lookout on Goose Mountain! 

Chris was in LOVE! This was his type of town/ area! 

The first look at the Black Bear! 

What a great profile shot of this beauty! 

My night and trip was MADE!

We then went into the downtown area to look for a place to eat dinner. We found great parking and then went to a little sushi place called MomoSushi that turned out to have the absolute best sushi we have ever had. Vancouver is known for outstanding Asian food but this sushi was to die for. We explored a little more of downtown by foot before deciding to go back to the hotel. After all, we had been awake for over 21 hours straight at this point.

Seriously the BEST sushi EVER! 

MomoSushi in downtown Vancouver! 

On our way to our hotel we left downtown via Hastings street and saw things that we had never seen before. Now I have been to countless large cities and metropolitan areas in the US and Canada and even London, so I have seen homeless people and the "sketchy" areas of most US cities but I have NEVER seen anything like this! It was awful! We saw people fighting and hitting each other, a man wearing a woman's thong (I may be scarred for life with this one) and all kinds of other things. It was definitely a sad situation. Chris was so shocked he decided to go around the block and witness it all again! 

I know that society makes you think they have it bad but let me tell you... THEY REALLY DO!
It was a very very sad thing to see! 

(Click to see it live)
Hastings St. in downtown Vancouver, B.C.

We made it to our hotel nearly 30 minutes later and we weaved in and out of traffic as Chris drove us back to the hotel in Surrey. As we arrived in the parking lot a Canadian asked Chris "Do you always drive without your lights on at night?" Chris was shocked as he just assumed the lights would turn on themselves like our cars. We laughed and laughed and will have wonderful memories of that little mistake. It was a "Stupid Americans" type of moment for sure! It was hilarious and wouldn't be the first of this type of memory either! More on that later! 

We ended the night in our very spacious hotel suite at the Four Points by Sheraton. It was huge and had plenty of space for all 5 of our suitcases! It was a GREAT hotel and I would highly recommend it when visiting Vancouver of the surrounding area. However, it also featured a HUGE bay window which let in the natural sunrise at 4:10AM the following morning so be sure to bring an eye mask if you are traveling to anywhere in the Pacific Northwest in the summer months! 

This was the Queen 1 room suite...Notice the large window! 

It was a fantastic room and only $116/ night which was a STEAL! 

This first day was great and really set the bar high for the rest of the trip. We cannot wait to see what day 2 will hold. Thanks again for following along and stay tuned for more of our North by Northwest Adventures! 

God is good... All the time! 

The Trip of a Lifetime Jitters and Stress

Our First "Rodeo"

June 13, 2016

Chris and I leave for our 10 year anniversary Alaskan cruise in 3 days and I am a little stressed over the whole trip and situation. Chris and I have cruised 7 other times but all to the Caribbean and out of either Houston/ Galveston or New Orleans. You see, usually before a cruise I am out shopping and choosing new flip flops and trying on my swimsuits and choosing cute beach hats and accessories to pack in my suitcase, which has no size or weight limit because it literally goes from my trunk to the cruise cabin and that is it. If I over pack... not a real big deal! I am not worried as to what I am taking as the cruise is all about rest and relaxation. If I forget something, it is not a big deal as whatever I was wearing to get on the ship will work in the Caribbean. Chris has always said "All I need is a few pairs of underwear and my passport and I am good". I laugh and roll my eyes but he is correct... in the Caribbean that is ALL he needs. Alaska has proven to be different... At least thus far!

We are flying into Seattle 5 days before our cruise leaves to visit Seattle and Vancouver BC. This has created a whole new ball game. I have to limit the size of my suitcase? Wait, it can only weigh 50 pounds? And God forbid I pack a full size shampoo. I mean I am going to be gone for 13 days, what if I run out of contact solution before then? The act of flying to our embarkation destination has created all kinds of stress and worry, especially for me. 

Plus these 5 days will be JAM-PACKED full of touristy activities like visiting the Space Needle and biking along the Cascade mountains as well as a short trip into Canada. I had forgotten how much WORK it takes to plan a "vacation". Where do you stay? Which part of town? Can we use public transportation the whole time (Didn't work for us as we are going to Vancouver)? Where do you park? How much will food cost? The list of questions go on and on and ON! Plus I have become "Danny Tanner" from Full House with all of my planning and the itinerary of the days spent in Seattle and Vancouver. I have a spreadsheet highlighting when and where we will be for crying out loud! Where is the "vacation" part of this trip? I might even wear a fanny pack... ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What has gotten in to me? Oh yeah, that's right... I am traveling the world and visiting a new city! SO MUCH STRESS!

Then there is the whole climate change issue. Now don't get me wrong, I am THRILLED to be going to a place where 60* is the HIGH but this Texas native is used to hot and humid weather and honestly does not have cold weather clothes. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find long-sleeve athletic shirts or a stupid beanie hat in Houston in JUNE? We have had this trip planned for 14 months, literally, yet I just assumed I had everything I needed. Back in 2011 when we moved from Oklahoma City to Houston I pretty much got rid of all of those things because who needs earmuffs in Houston... EVER? And you know what, in the past 5 years I have barely even pulled out my "heavy coat" that my native Kansas parents highly encouraged me to keep no matter what. I still have it but it is collecting dust in my guest bedroom closet. The scarves, mittens, gloves, hand-warmers and earmuffs... those were given to Goodwill back in 2011. So... here I am with very little cold(er) weather accessories... but darn it, I have the flip flops!

I am currently doing laundry and looking at my closet debating on taking my summer sundresses for dinner each night. This cruise is so different than ALL of our others. Chris will look somewhat funny, I'm sure, wearing his Hawaiian shirts, khaki shorts and flip flops to dinner each night. So what do we pack? We now consider ourselves expert cruisers and thanks to this blog we have thousands of people reading our reviews and learning from our experiences! Well let me just say... this will be our first "rodeo" (Can you see the Texan shining through?) and I am sure we will make a few mistakes! We are going to overpack... TRUST ME! Chris is notorious for it! We are going to forget somethings... But I think Chris's original statement will still prove to be true. As long as we have our passports and underwear, I think we will be good. We might freeze our "royal rastafarian nay-nays off" but we will be on the ship! And in Alaska... oh how I cannot wait! 

This trip has been on the forefront of our minds for quite some time and we have literally been saving for this trip for the past 3 years and it is already racking up costs like crazy! It will be the most expensive and longest trip we have EVER taken! Even more than the honeymoon... TO LONDON! Not to mention it is the longest we will have been away from our kids which will be 14 full days. We are so lucky and fortunate to have loving and wonderful parents that are going to take care of our kids and take them on a trip of a lifetime in our absence. Natalie and Luke are going to go with Gigi Shirley and Poppy to Atlanta, GA on another annual baseball trip.

The next 2 weeks are going to be full of stress and anxiety but more importantly packed full of memories and experiences that will last a lifetime. I cannot wait to see how it all turns out! I covet your prayers as my family embarks on this journey both in the Northwest and the Southeast!

I will have a separate blog for all THREE of these trips; Seattle./ Vancouver, Alaska Cruise and the kids trip to Atlanta with my parents! Stay tuned for tips, tricks and gorgeous pictures! Thanks again for following along! I cannot wait to share our first "rodeo" to ALASKA with all of y'all!

God is Good... All the time!

Click on a link to see our past cruising adventures:

Caribbean Princess- 2016

Carnival Triumph- 2015

Carnival Magic- 2015

Royal Caribbean Serenade of the Seas- 2015

Royal Caribbean Navigator of the Seas- 2014

Carnival Conquest- 2013

Carnival Conquest- 2006

I Want to be a GIANT

Spring 2016
Year 11... Houston, TX 

Disclaimer: I realize that no one may care or be even remotely interested in this topic but this post is more for me. There are days where I feel like I have no one to talk to or vent to and this is just a little of my frustrations that I am going through right now. Almost like a "Dear Diary" page. In 11 years of teaching I have not felt this depressed throughout the whole year and felt as if this is not really where I am supposed to be. This is unusual to me because I have known I wanted to be in the education field since I was 16, literally ½ my life. Yet at this point I feel like I could be anywhere but here.

A little about my personality

All my life I have been somewhat of an outcast and never REALLY fit in with the popular, strong or successful groups or at least not the groups I “wanted” to fit in with. In high school I was a cheerleader, volleyball player, basketball player and golf player but I was just average at all of those and I wanted to be the best. I decided in 10^th grade I would go down the music/ band road and I pretty much did that alone. I was the sole BAND NERD at my school. I “made my bed, now I have to sleep in it” at that point but I had no idea this road would be so political and so lonely at times.

By nature my personality wants to be recognized for a job well done, it’s just who I am. I have tried and am still trying to not be this way but I thrive on someone telling me “Good job” and “Way to go”. In addition, I have always had a mentality of “keeping up with the Jones’” and want to be a part of the successful group and I have let my successes (and failures) define me over the years. 

A little about my career

I have taught music for 11 years, 6 of which were band, and the past 5 years have been in Texas. I have always dreamed of being a band director and growing a successful band and music program. When I was in college as a music education major there were 2 distinct groups within that major; 1) those seeking band/ choir director positions and 2) those choosing to teach general or elementary music. There were several more directors than there was elementary music and I noticed real quickly the attitude that went with the general (classroom) music teachers. “Oh, you want to teach elementary music? That is great. That is where the heart of the music field is but we (the directors) will build up the programs and make them look successful. Good for you though.” This literally was the mentality and attitude, from the upperclassmen all the way up to the professors.

My freshman year of college I did not make the Pride of Oklahoma marching band, which was a MAJOR reason why I chose to go to OU. This was a huge set-back for me but I pressed on and stayed at OU instead of going home like a puppy with my tail between my legs and go to Tyler Junior College like 90% other graduates of my high school. From that point on I followed the same path as my high school days and never really fit in with the music ed/ band director crowd because they all had the bond that developed by being in the Pride. That whole freshman year was really hard on me and wondered why I was there and why I was trying to be something that I may not be... but yet I still knew that I wanted in my heart to be a band director and I was determined that I would overcome these issues. 

My sophomore and junior years I did in fact get into the Pride of Oklahoma and have made friendships with fellow players and I am grateful for that experience and those friendships. However, I turned that 136 hour/ 5 year degree into 4 years by pressing hard and taking incredibly heavy course loads because all I wanted to do was get out into the field and teach band.

I did my student teaching with arguably one of the absolute best band directors in the state of Oklahoma, and easily the best female director within the OKC metro. I had a passion for teaching band and both my mentor teachers could see that. They helped me blossom into a very good middle school band director and led me on a path towards band success.

In late spring 2005 I had an interview at Bristow, OK to be an assistant band director alongside an incredible educator and well known band director in Oklahoma. He offered me the position but I was seriously dating Chris at the time and knew a long-distance relationship would not work. Instead I was later offered a “one-man K-12” band director job at Bowlegs, OK. There I would serve as the K-12 general music AND band director. I got married during that year and I was only there for 1 year and then left to teach band at Grove School in Shawnee, OK to be closer to my now husband, Chris Davis.

I spent 5 years teaching band and general music at Grove and enjoyed it 85-90% of the time. There is always times were a bad situation or turn of events can bring you down but I LOVED teaching band and the actual JOB they hired me to do! During those 5 years I built the band program from 52 kids (5-8^th grade) to over 100. We received the first ever superior rating in the school’s history and I was elected “Teacher of the Year” for my campus and even my county. My administration liked me and I was “golden” but I was still an outcast amoungst my colleagues.

During our region meetings despite proving I was capable of growing a band program and having kids sit in the top bands at All-Region, I was still not selected as a leader or served as a chair or officer. This always bothered me and honestly I let it get to me too much but it is what it is. In fact, there were always certain people who were selected and got the awards and the mention (again, I need that and thrive on that... it's just who I am). Those same people currently have my dream jobs and are doing incredibly well. While I am happy for them, it eats me up inside thinking that could be me or “when will that be me”?

In 2009 Chris was laid off from his job and began the search for a new job and eventually a new career. In 2011 after nearly 18 months of unemployment Chris got a job offer to teach math in Houston, TX. We were ready for the next step and chapter in our lives. Personally I had been highly successful as a band director for 6 years and FINALLY I was going to be able to begin my dream of teaching band in the great state of Texas. I was so excited and had already been working on my resume and my portfolio. During the summer months I had several interviews for band jobs but I was never offered any of them and they were all far from where we would be living in north Houston.

I ended up spending 2 years teaching elementary general music in large north Houston school district that was very urban and not at all like the rich “white” school I came from in Oklahoma. During those 2 years I got pregnant and had our 2^nd child, Luke, but was not satisfied with teaching “just elementary music”. There were 1,100+ kids in this school so I had 40+ kids in each class on a daily basis. This was WAY too many kids to have a successful music class but I did try hard and looking back in some areas it was better than my current position as I had the instruments and support I needed as a music teacher. 

Towards the end of my 2^nd year there all of the SPECIALS teachers had to begin teaching core subjects during their class periods to help with decreasing test scores. I knew this was not for me as I am NOT a math teacher so I took that as a cue to look for a new job and I did.

So no it is summer 2013 and I am now diligently seeking a band job. I have been out of the field for 2 years and within 1 interview I could tell this would be a lot harder than I thought. I had taught band for 6 years, have a Master’s degree and have proven I can build and grow a SUCCESSFUL program but I still was not offered a band position. In fact, I had an interview in a small rural district in far north Houston that was well known for having a good band program. The interview went well and the administration loved me and practically offered me the job saying “We enjoyed talking to you today and think you fit in well at XXXX, now we are just waiting on Mr. _____ (the HS band director) to choose”. Well what do you know, I was passed by again. I took this particular rejection very hard as I knew people within this very small district and realized it was all about "who you know" and I just knew this is where my dream would begin. Yet again, God had other plans.

Later that summer I was offered an elementary music position across the street from the middle school where I was rejected (my current position). I was hesitant to accept another elementary position but honestly, I did not have any other offers at this point and I thought “Well, at least I will have my foot in the door when there is another opening”. Little did I know there would be 2 openings within the district the following summer. Did I get either of those jobs? Oh no, they hired someone younger, straight out of college, with “fresh” ideas and more importantly, someone who they knew. 

I spent the next 2 years watching from the outside just itching to get in there and teach band and be a part of a successful band program. I’ve offered my time and services for private lessons and helped with recruiting and really tried to put my name out there but there isn’t even vertical alignment in this district so the band directors barely even know my name let alone my abilities and capabilities.

The past 3 years I have spent at my current school have not been ALL bad. I have been able to take Natalie with school to me the past 2 years and while this is not the environment I would like or would have ever dreamed her being in (remember, I like to be in with the “good” groups) she is thriving and doing very well. In addition, I have become really close to all of my administrators and become more of a team player than I ever have in my life. Not to mention that teaching elementary music is much less demanding on my personal time than band would be. I have been able to spend a lot more time with my family and take extravagant trips that I may or may not be able to take if I was teaching band. But still my heart is just not in it… or better yet, my heart still wants more. My heart wants to teach band. I still have the OU mentality of “Oh good for you teaching elementary music”. I feel like if I retire as an elementary music teacher what impact have I made on the world, really? I feel like I would have settled and that bothers me! 

To this day I have kids from Grove tell me on social media how much I impacted their lives. I see old students of mine be HIGHLY successful themselves in music in higher education and I know that I had a part in that. But the past 5 years… how many kids have told me I have made a difference in their lives? ZERO! These kids do not like music and do not want to be in music. They want to be in PE. In elementary they do not get a choice so far too often I get classrooms full of negative attitudes and a lack of desire to be successful at music. Sure there are some that enjoy it and I relish in teaching those few but the majority of these kids could care less. Not to mention my passion and joy is gone as I am teaching music and art and wearing multiple other hats around the campus and it is just draining.

Fast- Forward to March 2016 and oddly enough there is another band job opening at the middle school across the street in my district. The same job that has been posted for now 3 years (hello turnover). My principal, of whom I am close with and respect, put in a good word for me to her husband, the principal at the middle school, but their family is moving so I am on my own again. I applied for that job but the current MS head director (who took the job originally in 2013) told me “we are already looking at other high qualified candidates but feel free to apply.” He also told me that he would like to “meet with me” and discuss the position but never got back to me. Why even bother? 

That position was closed in April but I found out that the HS Assistant job would be posted soon. The MS head director is going to slide into that position because EVERYBODY just LOVES him. So that leaves the MS wide open. This is my chance… Or so I thought. Oddly enough the wife of the MS director is also a band director and she will take the head MS job and then the assistant position will be filled by someone else they all know. Why am I even here? What is my purpose in the district? What difference am I making?

That was supposed to be me… I was supposed to get the job in 2013, and then become the head director in 2014 and now moving up to high school in 2016. That is the dream I have had for the past 10 years, literally!  And here I still sit… working to pay the bills as my passion has been sucked out. I have friends/ family who have struggled with this type of situation for years and they are some of the strongest people I know and I have high respect for them... I just need to be like them and not let these things get to me! 

It’s hard to watch… Now I know most of you are thinking “Get over it. Life SUCKS! Put on your BIG GIRL panties and deal with it” or "Get over yourself" and others are thinking "at least you have a job" and you would all be right! I know my husband is thinking this and probably my parents (who raised me better than that) too but I just feel defeated and crushed. I feel like I should be allowed even a small amount of time to be upset about this! 

I have had similar feelings in the past 5 years but this is stronger than previous years and times. I look at friends be successful at “stay at home” jobs or multi-level marketing and see close friends and even family completely change jobs and careers and are doing better than ever. Maybe that needs to be me… maybe this is the road I wanted and not the road HE wanted. I have become literally depressed about it and just feel lost. I have a great marriage and great family... so I guess "2 out of 3 ain't bad"! 

So... I want to be a GIANT

I read an article posted by a college friend and colleague about standing on the shoulders of giants. The article mentioned as a band director you stand on the shoulders of giants and then others stand on your shoulders to become successful.

Because now you’re the Giant. If you’re a band director – you’re the Giant. You may be the deciding factor of whether a child learns to play an instrument, feels included in a great organization, wants to come to school and believes he can face a challenge and reach a goal.

It’s a big job.

It’s a huge responsibility.

It’s scary.

It may be more than you signed up for.

But remember, someone did it for you.

Someone lifted you up and put you on their shoulders and let you see the world of music. The family of band. The satisfaction of reaching goals. The reward of dedication.

All I want to be is a Giant… I just want to be the shoulders for someone else.  At one point I was dreaming of being a MAJOR successful band director and even directing at the collegiate level (who was I kidding) and now I just want to be a director at all. I guess I will just have to keep dreaming.

My heart wants what it wants! I can't help that... Now to get over this pathetic pity party and press on. On to what? I have no idea but I cannot continue to let this crushed dream ruin my days! As I practiced my saxophone for many hours growing up I used to play "God is in Control". I need that song today... I know He is in control but it does not make this long journey any easier. I just have to remember that NO MATTER WHAT 

God is good... ALL the time!